Black History, a Tapestry of Hope

Written by Sydney Wright, Events & Communications Manager

As far back as I can remember I was taught the beauty and vibrancy of Black History. Like a well woven patchwork quilt, Black History Month is a culmination of years of brilliance, beauty, creativity, and spirituality. I was raised to take pride in my history. My culture runs deep in every part of the fabric of my making. I was cultivated to be in awe of the achievements of Alex Haley, Fannie Lou Hamer, Billie Holiday, George Washington Carver, and so many more. The contributions of figures like these have stitched together such a dynamic time of celebration and honoring each year.  

*NFNL does not own the rights to these images

As we enjoy and commemorate the rich threads of Black History, I can’t help but reflect on the history in the making here at New Friends New Life. In the last year over 328 women and youth decided to make history by committing to their growth. Every trauma informed counseling session, case management hour, and group session is a generational shift for our members. It is reported that 40% of sex trafficking victims in the U.S. are Black, despite Black people making up only 13.6% of the U.S. population. Our African American members have committed to engage in the fight against sexual exploitation and trafficking every time they enter the doors of NFNL. I find deep joy in the fact that every staff and members daily support the building of such a beautiful, redemptive, historic tapestry of hope.

New Friends New Life is a space for inclusion. Like beautiful textiles, we recognize each other’s intrinsic worth, value our diversity, and treat each other with dignity and respect. With this value at our core, I love to see Black History in the making through our staff every day. Bianca Davis, CEO, such a vital thread of NFNL, makes history daily with each dynamic leadership moment. Her tenacity, kindness, and vision are attributes we will honor and admire for years to come. I am truly inspired by our very own Annette Bailey and the historic bounds she has accomplished as our Program Resource Coordinator. Her truth telling, intentionality, and perseverance weaves a legacy of aspiration for all who encounter her. Here at New Friends New Life, we see Black History connected at the seams as our brilliant Accounting Director, Shenita Mitchell, works to maintain a financial foundation that will serve our staff and members for years to come. There are many more Black History makers that walk the halls of NFNL and as an African American woman, I am proud to work at a nonprofit that values Black History. New Friends New Life works to continue the legacy by adding a vital patch to the quilt of Black History and culture that will cover generations to come.

Illuminating the Shadows: A Critical Dialogue on Combatting Human Trafficking in Dallas

Excerpt below is from: Conference on Crimes Against Women Podcast

Episode 7: Illuminating the Shadows: A Critical Dialogue on Combatting Human Trafficking in Dallas

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The very streets of Dallas light up with a somber blue, a hue that's become the rallying cry against the night's darkest secret – human trafficking. It was a privilege to have Bianca Davis, CEO of New Friends, New Life, join us to unravel this crisis that casts shadows over our city. With January marking National Human Trafficking Prevention Month, our conversation wove through the brutal realities of the trade, the importance of vigilance, and the powerful legislative milestones that propel our fight forward.

Faced with the chilling statistic of four hundred trafficked teen girls a night in Dallas alone, the magnitude of this issue is staggering. We dug into the subtle yet coercive tactics that traffickers use to ensnare victims, often exploiting the most vulnerable among us. Awareness is our strongest weapon, and this dialogue serves as an urgent call to action for all. It's not just about recognizing the signs; it's about understanding the hidden languages of control and manipulation that traffickers speak. 

And it's not only about the victims but also the demand that fuels this black-market industry. Engaging men in the conversation around sex trafficking, through innovative programs like the ManKINDness Project, is pivotal in dismantling the societal constructs that allow such exploitation to thrive. We highlighted the vital partnerships between support networks like Genesis and New Friends New Life. Their collaborative efforts not only rescue survivors but also equip them with the tools to rebuild and thrive. Our episode is a clarion call – a plea for engagement and education in the digital age where predators lurk behind screens, targeting our youth. Together, we can turn awareness into action and transform the narrative of human trafficking.

Click HERE  to listen to the full episode on any streaming platform.

‘Tis Always the Season: How Your Gifts Help Us Grow

Written by Bianca Davis, CEO

At New Friends New Life, one of our six Core Values is Stewardship.  We interpret stewardship within our agency this way:  “With a spirit of gratitude, we utilize with great care the resources of time, talent, and treasures entrusted to our organization.”  In other words, we embrace the responsibility to make the very most of every donor’s gift in order to create mission-focused outcomes that help change the lives of the women and girls we serve.

Since the very first day I joined the nonprofit industry 12 years ago, as a development director, I’ve been amazed at the kindness and generosity of those who give.  Today, I remain in awe of our donors and their impact.  Whether it’s a volunteer who donates her time after a long day at work or a company that writes a check to support an event they can’t even attend, it is the donor who makes it possible for nonprofit organizations to fulfill their mission.

Over the past 25 years, we’ve identified several barriers that stand between a survivor and the new life she deserves – legal advocacy, employment, education, and housing. Thanks to your gifts, NFNL is strategically removing these barriers step by step.  This year, we have expanded our Legal Advocacy Clinic by hiring a paralegal to support our onsite staff attorney. We are also six months past the groundbreaking of Liberty Street Garden – an innovative partnership with The Meadows Foundation and Bonton Farms that creates employment opportunities for members in our Women’s Program. Next, we have our eyes set on creating an on-site education program to serve the 30% of our women who didn’t finish high school.  We are accomplishing these goals all while meeting the immediate basic needs of and providing trauma-informed counseling for nearly 350 women and girls this year alone.

We are growing to meet the needs of our members, and it is your giving, during this season and all year round, that fuels our growth.

The holidays are sprinkled with increased generosity and our members reap the benefits of the community’s kindness. Even today, our hallways are buzzing with gratitude as women pick up holiday gifts for their families. Thanks to you, 300 gift wishes were filled! In the coming days, donors just like you will be writing checks and making online gifts to causes that matter most. Know that if your list includes NFNL, we are committed to being good stewards of your resources, investing in ways that restore and empower women and girls in our community impacted by sex trafficking and exploitation.

For all the ways you have given of your time, talent, and treasures in 2023, I am in awe of you and cannot thank you enough!

For more ways to take a #StandforHER, purchase your Stand for Her t-shirt in preparation for Human Trafficking Awareness Day on January 11 or join NFNL’s Power of 10 Club.

Gratitude

Written by Lacy Montgomery, Adult Program Manager

It’s November. The holidays are upon us and we’re barreling toward the end of the year. For some of us, this means excitement, merriment, busy calendars, and seasonal decorations; good food and great friends and time spent with the family we love. For some of us, this season is more difficult. It means loneliness or reminders of painful relationships. It means financial stresses or the first holiday season without our loved one.

How do we remain grateful in both pain and in joy?

My favorite author, Anne Lamott, says that “gratitude begins in our hearts and then dovetails into behavior. It almost always makes you willing to be of service, which is where the joy resides. It means that you are willing to stop being such a jerk. When you are aware of all that has been given to you, in your lifetime and the past few days, it is hard not to be humbled, and pleased to give back.”

Joy resides in service. Getting out of our own head, putting our feet on the ground, one in front of the other, and finding someone to help. Gratitude in service can look like a smile given to a stranger. A dance on the sidewalk to the song in your heart. A donation to a local non-profit. A text to an old friend. A vulnerable conversation with a new friend. A toy drive for families who have so much stress and so little income that they can’t buy their children gifts. A blood donation. A letter to your grandmother. Even a glance at yourself in the mirror, offering love and compassion to you.

For some, this season of Thanksgiving is a season of service. For others, a season of mustering the courage to ask for help. How can you be the hand, reaching out to offer help? How can you be gratitude in action? How can you reside in joy?

Volunteers and staff prepare to serve Thanksgiving dinner to members

 Years ago, my family decided that in lieu of gifts, we would donate to our favorite organizations in one another’s names. Perhaps gratitude is a financial contribution to New Friends New Life. To help our organization continue to serve incredible, resilient, grateful women who have survived unthinkable abuse, trauma, and sexual exploitation. Or maybe you and your family could serve a meal together at NFNL, because community can begin at the table. Or you could even take your children shopping to purchase gifts for the New Friends New Life Angel Tree.

My son is not quite two years old, and he certainly wouldn’t understand a donation card, as he cannot yet distinguish between numbers and letters. But he will absolutely understand buying fun toys for others. I am determined to guide the growth of his little heart to one of service and gratitude. A heart, that the world he raises my grandchildren in might be filled with even more joy and service.

It is my hope that you choose to give this season. Our members and their families are thankful for every smile and gift.  

LGBTQIA+ History Month

Written by Avery Hammer, Adult Case Manager

Here at New Friends New Life, we have come to know that human trafficking is not one singular group’s issue, and as such, everyone should be aware of it and has a responsibility to seek education for themselves and those around them. The women and girls we work with come from different economic classes, countries, cultural backgrounds, and have varying beliefs and values. Even as we note that trafficking affects people of all kinds all around the world, there are people who are affected more often than others. For example, we know that 71% of human trafficking victims are women and girls, and they are often sold for sexual labor.

Similarly, we know that people of color and those who identify as part of the LGBTQIA+ community, are far more likely to be targeted for trafficking due to societal factors (discrimination, oppression, inequalities, generational trauma, etc.) that are largely out of their realm of control. As much as we hate to admit it, traffickers do have some intelligence in their vetting process and know how to identify those who experience vulnerabilities. Once traffickers have someone in their sights, they play the long game, seeking out unconditional trust and fealty that swiftly morphs into ownership and insurmountable debt: emotional, financial, or otherwise.

When you look at LGBTQIA+ youth, you see children that have been displaced or disowned by their families, bullied/ostracized by their peers, and have endured any number of abuses from a society that believes that their way of living and of loving is wrong. When you know that marginalized populations are more likely to experience trafficking, isn’t it obvious that LGBTQIA+ youth are at a disproportionally high risk for exploitation? Often, these youth are lured in with false promises of love, affection, shelter, employment, safety, and stability, and for those who have been deprived of basic needs or necessary care, it is an easy ploy for which to fall.

Of the youth experiencing homelessness, the LGBTQIA+ population makes up 40%. Of that 40%, 46% ran away due to family rejection, they are 7.4 times more likely to experience sexual violence and 3-7 times more likely to engage in survival sex, resorting to sexual acts in exchange for food, shelter, etc., to get their basic needs met. Traffickers seek out people with needs that can be filled easily by them and lead to dependency for their survival, so youth who are a part of the LGBTQIA+ community have a 33% chance of being picked up within 48 hours of leaving their home.

This is an important topic to be aware of as it affects so many of the youth in our nation. Look into current legislation, find ways to give back to organizations that help this population, and stay up to date on the news. You can make an impact in your community, all it takes is an open mind, heart, and arms.

If you or someone you know needs help, call the National Human Trafficking Hotline toll-free hotline, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at 1-888-373-7888 or text 233733 to speak with a specially trained Anti-Trafficking Hotline Advocate.

All For One?

Written by Jessica Brazeal, MA, LPC-S, EMDR Certified, Chief Programs Officer

For the last 14 years, I have been working as a therapist with survivors of domestic violence during the month of October, which also happens to be Domestic Violence Awareness Month. It is an honor to be a witness for these individuals every day, but it feels especially poignant during this month. Every year, I am reminded of the strength, courage, resilience, and general grit that survivors of domestic violence demonstrate daily. Every year, I continue to be in awe of these women I serve.

I began my career at Genesis Women’s Shelter & Support, another local non-profit that supports women and children that have been impacted by domestic violence, spending thousands of hours counseling women in abusive relationships. When I arrived at New Friends New Life, I quickly realized that so many of the elements present in domestic violence are also present in trafficking. Not surprisingly, most of the women we serve at NFNL have also experienced domestic violence itself. Domestic violence is an issue that affects 1 in 4 women nationally and 1 in 3 women in Texas, so this made sense to me. It seemed that this issue of women being controlled and abused by their partner in their homes was going to be a continued focus for me.

When your home is a war zone and every move you make could result in your injury or harm, whether that is physical or emotional harm, every day of survival requires such effort, focus and courage. Your alarm bells are ready at all times. Your sonar for any hint of threat is keenly honed. You are highly skilled at detecting any shift or change in the atmospheric pressure. You are a survivor. Unfortunately, that often takes a devastating toll on the bodies and minds of these strong and courageous individuals.

In that same way that any ongoing stressor impacts your physical health, domestic violence is no different. In addition to the physical injuries directly from abuse, the ongoing impact living in this type of environment has a direct impact on the body. Mental health suffers as a result as well. In our offices, we see increased levels of depression, anxiety, helplessness, overwhelm, hopelessness and hypervigilance as just a handful of potential symptoms someone may be experiencing as a result of the home they are living in. So often, absent the context, these individuals are given mental health diagnoses that are inaccurate due to their fear of disclosing the reality of what is occurring to their health providers. Their symptoms potentially match those of other major mental health diagnoses, which is then the diagnosis they are given, when in reality they are experiencing Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). One of the reasons this is so significant for survivors to understand is that organic mental illness or mental health diagnoses can be lifelong conditions to manage while PTSD is a mental health diagnosis that is resolvable. It doesn’t have to be lifelong. The suffering can end.

In her seminal work ‘Trauma and Recovery’ from 1992, Judith Herman says this about the tactics of an abusive partner and their impact: “The ultimate effect of these techniques is to convince the victim that the perpetrator is omnipotent, that resistance is futile, and that her life depends upon winning his indulgence through absolute compliance.” At the time, Herman was discussing domestic violence specifically, but read that sentence again. That sentence could just as easily be applied to the dynamic between a trafficker and his victim: perception of omnipotence, discouraging resistance, survival is dependent upon doing exactly what he says. The tactics are the same, the dynamic is the same, the impact is the same.

Because of these similarities and connections, at New Friends New Life we recognize the importance of Domestic Violence Awareness Month and providing support around this experience as an integral part of the work we do with our members. Herman goes on to say in ‘Trauma and Recovery’ that the “first principle of recovery is the empowerment of the survivor.” This brings us back to that initial point of the strength, courage, resilience, and grit of the women we serve and all survivors of domestic violence. When she first begins to receive support, she may not believe these things or see these qualities in herself. Our job is to highlight them over and over again until she sees in herself what we see in her. And what we see is a woman who is unstoppable.  

Herman, J. (1992). Trauma and recovery: The aftermath of violence from domestic abuse to political terror. New York: Basic Books.